Southern Georgia Air Traffic Control

Atlanta ATC: "Atlanta Center to Saudi Air 911. You are cleared to land eastbound on runway 9R."

Saudi Air: "Thank you Atlanta Center. Acknowledged, cleared to land on Infidel's runway 9R. Allah be Praised."

Atlanta ATC: "Atlanta Center to Iran Air 515. You are cleared to land westbound on runway 9-R."

Iran Air:" Thank you Atlanta Center. We are cleared to land on Infidel's runway
9-R. Allah is Great."

Pause: STATIC......................

Saudi Air: "ATLANTA CENTER - ATLANTA CENTER"

Atlanta ATC: "Go ahead Saudi Air 911."

Saudi Air: "YOU HAVE CLEARED BOTH OUR AIRCRAFT FOR THE SAME RUNWAY GOING IN OPPOSITE DIRECTIONS. WE ARE ON A COLLISION COURSE. INSTRUCTIONS, PLEASE!"

Atlanta ATC: "Well bless your hearts and praise Jesus. Y'all be careful now and tell Allah "hey" for us -- ya hear?"